Going through a breakup is a very difficult thing. At times, surviving a breakup might seem like the toughest thing in the world; but believe it or not, you can and will survive it. Of course you feel emptiness inside, which makes moving forward and getting back with your life even harder. All you really want to do is lie in bed and hide under the covers. But you need to look around and realize that most people have gone through a hard breakup and they have survived, just like you will. Before you know it, you will be getting back to enjoying your life.
When it comes to coping with a breakup and the pain that goes along with it, you can’t keep your feelings inside. Spend time with a close friend you can confide in and share a good cry and tell that friend how you are feeling. If nothing else, get a pen and paper and write your feelings down. You could even get a special journal and write all your feelings down; and after you have gotten it all out, you can burn the journal, in a symbolic moving-on ceremony. Whatever you do, you have to try to get the pain out. Don’t keep it bottled up.
As you start feeling your old self returning, you can begin to look at your relationship to understand what was good about it and what was bad. Understanding what happened in the relationship will allow you to make the best decisions regarding your next move. If things were good for the most part and you enjoyed being together, there might be a chance to get back together. But if you were having serious problems, there’s a good chance that you two are done.
Now that you’ve taken the time to know what happened in your relationship, it is time to decide if you will try to get back together or if you will throw in the towel and move on from this relationship. If you realistically think there is something still there and you want to get back together, there are important steps and techniques you need to follow to make it work. Many of these are based on the differing psychologies between men and women.
If on the other hand you have decided to move on, you and your partner need to separate your lives. In a relationship, especially a long term one, it can be surprising how much your lives have become intertwined and splitting them up is not always an easy thing. You need to make this change; you don’t want any landmines left over that can emotionally destroy you.
Dealing with a breakup is really tough, but it definitely can be done. Use your friends and family as a support system to help you get through this tough time. People have compared breakups to having a death in the family, so obviously it is tough to deal with. Some of this is just too emotional to tackle all by yourself.
Written by John R. Roberts
