Articles – Page 3 – Agenda Magazine Archives

There Once was a Man from Vagina…Or, how we’ll learn to stop trying to censure (and censor) sexuality.

Let’s just start stating the obvious, shall we?

I have to admit that my biggest guilty pleasure is “America’s Next Top Model,” clearly a standout in the reality television niche if only for its impenitent appreciation of unattainable beauty (at least for a few of us) and, of course, the requisite schadenfreude when a particularly bitchy model receives her walking papers. Something about “Top Model” delivers this sensation better than any other reality program currently on TV—”Survivor” has passed its beguiling stage and entered into territory usually charted by and reserved for long-winded skits on “Saturday Night Live”; “American Idol” only reaffirms my belief that pop culture thrives on mediocrity; and the physical appeal of “talent” on “Elimidate” et.al., reflects a saddening trend in the national average when it comes to health, sex and beauty (not to mention demeanor). But, perhaps the most cleverly constructed reality isn’t what’s on television, but instead is that ephemeral little raison d’etre for teens and 20-somethings on the Internet. You guessed it, MySpace. Now, amid all the recent brouhaha about its apparent pervert-conducive environment and the imminent “blog backlash” that’s awaiting some stellar scandal (as if 2005’s online murder confession wasn’t enough), parents suddenly have to confront this newfound medium for public adolescent sexuality and personal information dissemination. How’s that for reality? But, you know me: I immediately place the bulk of the blame on a subdued sexual milieu that’s been encouraged and exploited by a government eager to win back and retain its fundamentalist party base, much to the chagrin of those of us without hang-ups who are able to recognize and apply tact in public situations. Sadly, many of these MySpace nymphets and studs-in-training are suffering from a lack of open, mature discussion with their parents about sexuality—especially teen sexuality—and their ignorance is manifesting itself in revealing personal Web page images and seductive blog bios. We smart adults have abandoned these social sites and returned to normal human interaction—or have found other more mature Web sites that don’t cater to high school kids looking to de-virginize each other. Naturally, however, the lecherous miscreants perusing MySpace exploit the blatant lack of judgment by enticing curious preteens into premature maturation. And these children, bereft of adequate understanding of what is and is not appropriate, exercise their curiosity in potentially dangerous ways. If there is one sure fact in life, it is that everything needs an outlet, some form or formula for catharsis, because without it, what burdens our minds eventually manifests in our actions—sometimes absent of logic, that little voice that says, “Hey…why don’t you take a second to rethink this, eh?” Being inquisitive about reality and having an immediate way to sate that awe can possibly produce an unwanted result. The most effective combatant in this battle against further decadence of the next generation, whose Web-savvy nature could be made or broken by this reasoning, is an unfiltered approach toward sexuality in the public realm. Let’s stop letting a repressed few dictate how much exposure to sex our children have. Between half-naked, influential celebrities and the omnipresent World Wide Web, children are deluged with images that at the very least demand explanations before their re-enactments are attempted in blog profile photos. American children especially are at risk because, unlike European and other open-minded nations, the United States takes somewhat bittersweet pride in just how sheltered the majority of its children are. Censorship recently has become a sort of emblem for die-hard politicians. Pretty soon we’ll need permits to take showers, lest we see our own naked bodies without the explicit approval of our representatives. And this all stems from a sick embracement of the continued suppression of something that’s always been and always will be.

So let’s state the obvious. Rather than wait until your 15-year-old daughter meets a 52-year-old man with more than a passing interest in her “hobbies” and “favorite music,” why not immerse your children in the already seedy world of over-eroticized reality television and force them into having long, thorough and repulsive conversations about the wonderment and consequences of sex. Inundation is the best method, I believe. Or, at a minimum, parents should make an attempt to lull their kids away from solely seeing an idealized version of what society and children are like and show them the results of poor decisions. They clearly are incapable of recognizing that their idols, their celebrities have flaws, and (although unbelievably) tact. The sexy, young women on “The Bachelor” and “Blind Date” that they emulate are not the best examples of maturity, and parents need to tell children that, rather than tightening the blinders so that they can’t see the viscera beneath that over-simplified and deceptive picture of desired sexuality that reality television, Internet, and the entertainment industry have mistakenly conveyed. A blog should not be a child’s introduction to reality, nor should a scripted “real-life” television show. That’s the reality, folks, believe it or not.

Written by Natalie Martin

The Battle of The Sexes

Battle of the Sexes

It doesn’t take me long to size up a man. Within ten minutes my mind places him in a category either “friend,” “make out buddy,” or “boyfriend/husband material.” However, I have often wondered if men put women into the same categories. When I was still naïve, I believed they did until one day a friend of some years asked me to “take our relationship to the next level.” I wrote the whole experience off as a fluke but soon each of my guy friends followed suit, all trying to upgrade our relationship from friend to girlfriend with the dreaded question “Can we take this relationship to the next level?” Of course I had a problem with this for two reasons. #1. I don’t know what the hell that means! It’s one of those bad relationship catch phrases (like “I love you but I’m not in love with you”) that men use as emotional camouflage to hide behind. It is all about strategy and this is their check. All they have to do is sit and wait. However, unlike chess, men are looking for a checkmate. It’s as if a man believes the conversation will go something like this…HIM: You know Susie, I think we should take this relationship to the next level. What do you think? SUSIE: Oh Yes! I would love to be your sex slave! And can I cook and clean for you too, pretty please?

In a man’s mind this scenario is not a mere dream; it is a reality, using the right strategy. You see, I’ve found that men take a “war strategy” approach to love such as: get her before she gets me, never reveal your position, don’t fire until fired upon, and a surprise attack is the best advantage to have over your opponent. They believe using these strategies will ensure victory, but like all men going to war they know there is a chance they will lose or in this case have a conversation like this…HIM: You know Susie, I think we should take this relationship to the next level. What do you think? SUSIE: Now John, you already know I think of you as more than a friend… you are more like a big brother. Someday I want you to be a groomsman at my wedding. Wouldn’t that be great? Aren’t you glad we’ve never had feelings for each other? I mean us dating would have been a nightmare, don’t you think? HIM: Yeah. That would have sucked.

The strategy somewhat worked; the enemy does not know his true position. It is a small victory, not the victory he hoped for but a victory. This is why I hate this question because for the woman it is a surprise attack. His full forces are advancing and you sent your army out for manicures and pedicures! You have been fired upon, and having been surprised, you only have two options: either confront the enemy or run like hell. Unsurprisingly, I have always chosen the latter of the two and ended up in an uncomfortable conversation more like this…HIM: “I think we should take this relationship to the next level. What do you think? ME: “I’m sorry, what? I wasn’t paying attention.” HIM: “I think it is time we try taking this relationship to the next level.” ME: “You know what? I totally forgot I have to do something today, um, I’m going to go. I’ll call you later though, soooo…O. K. Bye.” Moments like this bring me to the second reason I hate being asked to upgrade a relationship.

#2. It’s just weird!! I’ll elaborate with a little example. Say you meet a guy in high school, college, or at work and you become “friends.” You become very comfortable with one another and you talk to said “friend” about how you hate boyfriend A, then boyfriend B, and boyfriend C was the worst! You confide in said “friend” telling him that you have had it, you will never find Mr. right and from now on you are replacing men with me time. It is at this moment said “friend” decides to say (you guessed it) “MAYBE WE SHOULD TAKE OUR RELATIONSHIP TO THE NEXT LEVEL.” That one awkward moment hits you like only one other awkward moment can, when you go on a bad date and the guy insists on walking you to your door. You think oh crap he’s going to want to kiss me. What should I do, all the while he’s rambling on about how much fun he had blah, blah, blah. At this point you just pray he shuts up and goes home. All of a sudden he starts leaning closer with that head tilt and everything starts moving in slow motion (but in a bad way). Suddenly you realize he’s about to make contact so you turn your head to the side at the last minute and give him the cheek. Then you have to pretend that you didn’t know he was going to kiss you, which is a total lie and you know he knows it is a total lie, so you both just stand there. Then you feel like you should say something so you mumble the first thing that comes to your head like “so…it’s really late” or “all right…well, good night” and you try adding a yawn or some weird gesture like holding up your key or giving him a little wave so he knows you are serious. Until he leaves it feels like you cannot breathe. Yeah, having a friend of many years ask you to “take your relationship to the next level” feels just like that.

Now, why would a man put you and himself through a moment like this? Here is my theory, I call it the “Donner Party Syndrome,” or D.P.S for short, because much like the Donner party turned the people in their wagon train into a potluck dinner, in times of extreme loneliness or sexual dry spells, men turn girl-friends into girlfriends. So to avoid moments like this, get your male friends laid by someone else on a regular basis, and they will never hit on you. There is only one problem with this theory that I’ve relied on since high school…it’s WRONG! Which is weird because I thought my theory was airtight until a recent incident revealed a very large hole.

Not too long ago I decided to play matchmaker with two friends of mine. They seemed to have a lot in common: same age, bad divorces, a good sense of humor; and both are really creative. So, I email my friend Rick (whom I hadn’t spoken to for a couple of months) to play catch up. I tell him I’m engaged, ask him if he’s seeing anyone…normal catch up stuff. He replies he isn’t seeing anyone at all. I respond, “Great, because I want to hook you up with a friend of mine…we’ll have to get together and discuss.” He writes back, “Sure, we can get together next week.” I reply, “O. K…until then, stay single.” I log off and head out of town for a week to a place where time stands still and DSL, TiVo, and call notes do not exist…my parents’ house. So it takes me a week to get Rick’s response: “Stay single, why? Are you getting cold feet?” I think ha, ha, ha, that Rick! What a kidder. I hit reply and write, “No cold feet here. I want to set you up with my friend, remember?” His response is, “Oh, I can’t. I have a girlfriend. We’ve been dating for a couple of months and I think we are in love.”

Now this baffles me. Why didn’t he tell me he had a girlfriend when I originally asked him? So, I turn to the one person that is used to my crazy life experiences, Matt. (He’s the fiancé.) He reads the emails and says (rather smugly I might add), “Well, it is pretty obvious to me. He thought you asked him if he was single because you wanted to hook up with him, or something, so he said yes. Then when you clarified that you wanted to play matchmaker with your friend, he told you about the girlfriend. Basically, he was hoping to hook up with you.” I was shocked. How can that be? That’s not right. That doesn’t coincide with my D.P.S theory that male friends only hit on female friends in times of dire sexual/intimacy emergency. If he has a girlfriend, why would he need to sleep with me? While I was pondering this question another of my male friends, Jeff, calls. I tell Jeff what Rick had done and Jeff offers the same explanation as Matt. So it’s true!

Now, the question was does every guy think like this? There was only one way to find out: a nasty little experiment with Jeff as the subject. For the record, Jeff has a girlfriend seventeen years his junior and we have been friends for a little over a year, no chance of D.P.S. here. I begin by asking him, “You think men and women can just be friends?” “Yeah, sure,” he says. I reply, “Then how come every guy I’ve ever been friends with has hit on me at least once?” He interrupts with “every guy except ONE.” “Oh yeah,” I say, “my gay friend never hit on me.” “No,” he laughs, “I was talking about me.” “Whatever!” I shoot back, “If you could sleep with me, you so would.” He replies, “I have never hit on you and I know for a fact that I would never sleep with you.” Hmmm, a huge blow to the ego but interesting, maybe Rick is a fluke. I trudge on “Why wouldn’t you sleep with me? Is it because you think I’m fat?” (Incidentally, accusing a man of calling you fat always throws him off guard because men know women are super sensitive about it. Normally, if you weasel that into any argument you’ll get what you want. It works a lot like crying.) Jeff says, “No, I don’t think you are fat. It’s just that you aren’t the type of girl you mess around with.” “What does that mean? Is that a nice way of calling me unattractive or something? Guys have been telling me that since high school and I still don’t know what that means!” To which he replies, “You are the kind of girl a guy marries. You don’t want to just mess around with a girl like you, ‘cause if you make the wrong move, you lose the friendship. So you have to decide to go for it or just be her friend.” Even though my guy to girl friend ratio has always been around 3:1, I had never heard this before. What’s a girl to do? Get more information, of course. “Really, what makes me a girl guys want to marry? I know it’s not because I can cook.” Then he says, “I don’t know….you are just a fun, laid back, cool person, and a guy can picture hanging out with you for the rest of his life. You see men have categories they put women into.” “Really,” I say acting surprised, “what are they?”

–Warning you are about to read a section of the very elusive and secretive guy code, prepare yourself– The categories men classify women in are as follows: (A.) women they want to sleep with; (B.) women they hope they can sleep with; (C.) women they are willing to marry to sleep with. This information blows a hole into my D.P.S. theory, just when I thought I had men figured out. However, getting this information is a victory, not the victory I expected, but a victory. We women no longer have to be blindsided when our male friend asks, “Can we take this relationship to the next level?” We have men right where we want them in our crosshairs. Now you understand what he really means and once a man reveals his position, what you choose to do with this information is entirely up to you. You can (A.) accept his proposal on your terms; (B.) run like hell; or (C) use it to your advantage. After all, a man will do anything for you if he thinks he will have a chance with you someday. I know it sounds awful, but then again all is fair in love and war.

Written by Jessica Mouser

Breast Cancer Month October – A Month Where ‘The New Black Is Pink’

October – A Month Where ‘The New Black Is Pink’

These days there is a lot of talk about “going green,” but the truth is that green isn’t the only color getting attention. It seems safe to say that for the month of October “the new black is pink.”

For more than 20 years, the month of October has been dedicated to building awareness and sharing information on the most common type of cancer that affects women across the world. There are over 2 million women in the United States alone that have been treated for cancer. Last year over 40,000 women and 300 plus men had their lives taken by this horrible disease.

Thanks to combined efforts of several government agencies, professional medical associations, and national public service organizations, the National Breast Cancer Awareness Month organization has been able to reach out and touch thousands of individuals. Home entertainment companies, cosmetic lines, and clothing designers are all making a stand to help not only raise money but awareness for the cause. The everyday consumer now has an opportunity to support breast cancer research just shopping for life’s little necessities.

This month “DVDs for a Cure” will be available once again. Last year, MGM and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment partnered to produce a collection of “pink packaged” films during the month of October. The campaign sold over 400,000 DVDs in 2007, and fifty cents from each sale was contributed to Susan G Komen for the Cure. Titles such as, Thelma and Louise, Legally Blonde , and In Her Shoes are just a few that will be available this year.

“Pink Ribbon” house ware is another way to support research. Manufacturers like Dyson, KitchenAid, and Dirt Devil are just a few that have provided your everyday cooking and cleaning appliances in a shade of pink that will not only add a fashionable flare to your home, but also serve as a daily reminder that we need to be making strides to find a cure. Vacuum cleaners, utensils, and irons are all essentials for a household and can now be purchased with a portion of the money going towards a greater good than just helping you mix your cake batter or clean your floor.

Hallmark launched a “Cards for the Cure” campaign in 1999. Since then $2.7 million in donations has gone to the Susan G Komen for the Cure foundation.

The beauty industry is just another of many that have jumped on board to give people a chance to benefit others while benefiting themselves. Pantene allows women to keep their hair silky smooth while at the same time helping to support a campaign which provides real wigs for women battling cancer. Smashbox Cosmetics donates 10% of all ‘O Gloss’ sales during the month of October to the “Look Good Feel Better Campaign,” a program solely supported by corporate donors that helps women to deal with appearance-related changes from cancer treatments. There is the “Pink Collection” by Estee Lauder, which includes the Elizabeth Hurley Lip Color Collection and Beautiful Eau de Parfum Spray. All donate a fraction of profits to the Breast Cancer Foundation. Plucking your eyebrows has never been so stylish with the “Breast Cancer Ribbon” tweezer by Tweezerman. A dollar from each purchase goes to “Rethink Breast Cancer.” The world of beauty is now very intertwined with breast cancer awareness. With that said, for many gals beauty has become more than skin deep.

Breast cancer is such a powerful disease that it is one of the few topics that can even bring our politicians together. Both presidential candidates, Senator Obama and Senator McCain, have stated that they intend to increase research funding.

Politics, beauty, fashion, entertainment . . . different worlds and businesses all coming together for a common good; each reaching out and doing what they can in their own way to raise awareness in our community. October is only one out of the twelve months we should devote to finding a cure for a disease that has touched the lives of so many. Breast cancer does not just hurt its victims. Make no mistake, family and friends all suffer when just one suffers. But if we stand together to raise awareness and funds to support those who have experienced the disease firsthand and those whose hands are trying to find a cure, we can and will be successful.

Written by Shannon Haggard

A Cause Macabre: What Did We Learn from Stanley “Tookie” Williams?

Written by Natalie Martin

So this is how the so-called “socially responsible” public unites against a controversial government sanction? Critics of the death penalty maintain a special place in my heart because I am forever locked in a love/hate relationship with them. While I appreciate their concern for the disparate numbers of African American death row inmates, compared with non-black prisoners on the “Green Mile,” I can’t help but believe that they never seem to seriously think about the poster child they choose to use for their latest “anti-capital punishment” campaign. With the blanket commutation of more than one hundred people sitting on Illinois’ death row by the state’s departing Republican governor and the influence of DNA that is causing many justices to overturn convictions, clearly the argument exists that capital punishment is a flawed practice. However, in considering a new symbol to champion their cause, did death penalty opponents really think that Stanley “Tookie” Williams was the best choice for galvanizing support?
(Why must I feel compelled to preface the following diatribe with the words: “I am extremely pro-black”?)

Williams is not in any way, shape or form a hero. It befuddles me that anyone—especially someone black—would align him- or herself with an admitted gang member, killer (allegedly), and criminal. Let’s, for a second, go beyond his disputed involvement with the murders of four people in 1979 and look at the spectrum of Williams’ life: founder (or co-founder, depending upon whom you believe) of the infamous Crips gang; absentee father; accessory to armed robbery; children’s book author; Nobel Peace Prize candidate (multiple nominations); alleged murderer; and death row inmate. Is it too pessimistic to point out a glaring imbalance—in terms of “good vs. bad”—when looking at his background? No amount of redemption or anti-gang books can undo the enormous negative influence his actions have had on African American culture and urban communities. Lest I sound cold and callous, I believe that the legacy of his gang affiliation far outweighs the crimes for which he was tried, convicted, and executed. In no way am I mitigating the act of murder or undervaluing the suffering of his—again, alleged—victims because of their race. What I’m proposing is that, even in their tireless effort to bring Williams to justice, the U.S. courts overlooked the additional deaths for which urban gangs are responsible—call it “the osmotic casualty factor.” For Williams, perhaps benignly, the creation of the Crips was a way to quell inner-community violence and police brutality in poorer neighborhoods; however, the formation also spawned the self-perpetuating destruction of those same black and inner-city communities through drugs and crime.

An incalculable number of African Americans (and Latinos, and whites, ad infinitum) have died because of this man, and not a single opponent of the death penalty can deny the aftereffects of his prodigal progeny. In addition to providing black men one more stereotype that they must nullify, Williams and his clan did what I feel is worse than any routine racist act: They poisoned their own. It’s bad enough the black community must continue to fight institutionalized racism and prejudice to the point that blacks have become irreparably stratified. Now we have to deal with the self-destructive exploitation of our brethren at the hands of dope dealers who, in their ambition to achieve “white” wealth, look no further than slinging rock to their equally oppressed black neighbor? I think not.

HAVE WE GONE A-STRAY? One bone, a couple of chew toys, and your dog will be loyal and loving to the end.

Have We Gone A-Stray?

I have a baby girl named “Shay” and of course I think she is absolutely fabulous. She is smart, adorable, and lovable. She loves me unconditionally. Yes, I’m proud doggie mommy, and I’m not the only one. In our trips to the park, I’ve met other proud moms and dads. While our little ones are sniffing one another’s bums and romping in the pond, we watch from the sidelines. We discuss the best doggie daycares, schools, the healthiest dog food, the best bark parks, and of course potty training. Some parents are very competitive, spouting out “AKC this” and “breeding that,” but I’m not one of those “show dog” moms. (Those people are really out there.) I see them at the park having conversations with their dogs and wonder when did it become normal to treat a dog like a person? The next day, I set off for answers at the local college’s library, and after a couple of hours I had three phone numbers and some idea as to why people treat their pets like children.

First and foremost, I blame Saddam Hussein. I really don’t have “facts” to back this up but I figured since the government blames Saddam for a variety of problems, eh, why not tack on one more.

Our next stop on the blame game timeline would be a song some consider a classic, “Who Let the Dogs Out?” This song stirs up so many emotions: anger, sadness, worry, fear, and sympathy. Those artists were brave enough to really make a statement, and it got the American public thinking, “What would happen if my dog was let out?” The country went into panic mode and there was an alert system started. It was color coded with green, meaning your doggie was safe, to orange, meaning there is a pretty good chance your dog could be “let out.” Nonetheless, the public was cautious under any color. No one ever wanted to be haunted by the question, “Who let the dogs out?”

The American people were looking to be protected and informed, so they turned to the people they chose to be their leaders, celebrities. Once the celebrities announced they had a plan, we all sighed in relief. The celebrities told us in order to keep our pets safe, we have to keep them by our sides at all times; and as you and I both know, celebrities always practice what they preach. Everywhere you looked there were articles about how celebs keep their dogs near to them: in their purse, or on set, even at the salon. Their amazing stories of such generosity were so inspiring that the public took notice. Then, dogs were crowned the “newest must-have accessory” by USA Today, People, and InStyle.

It was then that we opened our homes to our favorite pets. Suddenly, our beds were being taken over, we were being woken up by licks to the face (and you don’t want to know where that tongue has been), the carpet was covered with chew toys, and we were losing control. This angered us, but we looked to our celebrity leaders and realized that maybe there was something behind our pets’ bad behavior. Our curiosity was peaked; we wanted to know what was going on inside the minds of our precious puppies. Enter the pet psychic, a woman I really consider a national hero. She shared our dogs’ thoughts with us, and finally we found out what our favorite family member thought of us . . . and the news wasn’t good. Our dogs hate us. This realization created a massive wave of guilt, like nothing ever seen before. Suddenly, there was a public outcry, “Give us something to buy so we can give it to our dogs and they will like us!” Petsmart and Petco answered our cries and finally we were able to buy the love of our dogs.

It didn’t take us long to figure out buying off our dogs was a lot cheaper and easier than buying off say . . . children. One bone, a couple of chew toys, and your dog would be loyal and loving to the end. There was never any back talk, or arguments, no need to worry. Your dog wouldn’t sneak out past curfew, or get a tattoo, or come home with a weird piercing. And if your dog happened to get knocked up, you could give all the puppies away with a clean conscience. It was clear raising a dog was a lot easier than raising a child, but people still had a desire to be moms and dads. It was then a compromise was born. Why not just raise our puppies like people?

And here we are. Shay started going to daycare, play dates, and bark parks. She dresses up for Halloween and has her picture taken with Santa Claus every year. Sometimes I am disgusted that I turned into one of “those” people, but on the bright side, I don’t have to pay for her to go to college . . . at least not yet!

Written by Jessica Mouser

Protein Power – Full Disclosure

What Is Protein, and What’s in It for Me?

This issue we are taking Agenda readers on a revealing tour of protein as we delve into what protein is, why you need it, the buzz behind protein diets, and how they really work.

So What Is Protein?

There are three major (macro) nutrients our bodies require to keep us in royal health and balance: fats (lipids), carbohydrates, and protein. All forms of meat are dominantly protein, but you can find variant amounts of protein in just about anything that grows, as protein is the base for the growth of life. Protein’s primary function in our bodies is to serve as a building tool. Protein itself is created of subunits called amino acids, the true building blocks. Think of amino acids as puzzle pieces. There are 20 different puzzle pieces in total, and a different combination of puzzle pieces creates a different picture with its own unique purpose. There are 9 essential amino acids our body cannot create and must obtain from our diet and 11 that it can acquire all on its own. All 20 puzzle pieces are vital for normal growth and daily function, as well as critical for peak health and fitness.

So Why Do I Need Protein?

1) Structure

Each variant combination of amino acids serves a different purpose in your body, ranging from building your muscles, growing your hair, and repairing you to helping to create hormones and keeping skin youthful. Protein gives your body structure. It literally keeps your teeth in your gums, keeps your organs together, and shapes-come-hither curves that beg for summer sun. Collagen (the secret to young beautiful skin) actually makes up for 25% of the protein in your body, making protein very significant.

2) Regulation

It also serves to regulate your body’s hormones, enzymes, immune system and fluid balance. Inadequate protein in your diet can cause frequent illness, low energy, poor digestion, dehydration, slow recovery times, reduced sex drive, mental fog, and a host of other problems. These problems are a result of your body simply needing to do a job and not having the building blocks it needs to complete its task. When your body needs any of the 9 essential amino acids due to insufficient diet, it will break down healthy, active muscle or organ tissue to retrieve what it needs. Your body will trade some of your nice arm muscle in order to keep you breathing. Tissue breakdown (catabolism) results from imbalanced nutrition, compared to physical demands, significant calorie reduction, or starvation. Your body will begin to recycle itself to survive. Worst yet is the fact that muscle deterioration dramatically slows down metabolism because muscle tissue is a powerful calorie-burning engine. The less muscle you have the slower your metabolism, meaning you can eat less and gain weight easier. This is very typical in most dieting American women who cut calories too low, sacrificing muscle. Low muscle women who are on a dieting cycle merely look at food and gain weight because their bodies are less equipped to process the food, leading to greater storage. Yes, these women are losing weight, but muscle weight. In exchange for losing 5 pounds of muscle she will now need to eat 250 calories a day fewer to stay the same weight. One pound of muscle burns 50 calories a day extra, so a lean toned protein-filled body is allowed to eat a lot more to stay a lot more beautiful. Remember that although muscle weighs three times more than fat, it is also three times smaller, creating a fine tight appearance. Go protein!

3) Energy

Protein finally serves as a potential source of energy. Your body loves to use carbohydrates and fat as a primary source of energy, while protein is left for last. Your body stores about 500-1500 calories of carbohydrates throughout your body in the form of glycogen for immediate fuel access, and it stores fat in all the places you love to hate; but your body does not store protein. Your body prefers to use carbohydrates as a primary source of energy for intensive physical demands and higher functions (brain and nerves), as it is a fast and efficient source of fuel. Fat (lipids) is also an excellent source of energy, but it is primarily used for less intensive physical demands and non-glucose dependent cells (like muscle cells). You use fat for energy as you sit at your desk doing your work. Fat burns longer but much slower, obviously, or we would all look like Greek statues. Last on the chain of command is protein which is not a great source of energy as it takes the longest to convert into a usable form of fuel for our bodies, and still it is inferior as fuel compared to carbs and fat. Your body works three times harder to convert protein into usable fuel in comparison to carbohydrates, one of the reasons for high protein diets becoming so infamous for fat loss.

Protein for Weight Loss?

So how do low carbohydrate / high protein diets work? Well, they basically convert your carb-burning body into a fat-burning body through manipulation. The science lies in your liver, which converts carbs you ingest into glucose for immediate energy or stores them in your liver as glycogen. The liver will release glucose (immediate fuel) into your blood system for cellular energy and stored lipids (fat) into your system for simpler non glucose dependent cells (like muscle cells), conserving glucose for needier cells. Your liver can store an estimated 12-hour supply of fuel; but once it runs out, it begins to convert amino acids (protein) into glucose (immediate fuel). The more complex cells (brain & nerve) need more than this protein fuel so your body begins to convert the released fat energy in your blood into what is known as ketone bodies (upgraded fat energy). Your brain and nerve cells are now forced to partially accept this less effective fat energy (ketones), and the body is now forced to use only fat and protein for energy (ketosis), resulting in dramatic body fat depletion.

So What’s the Catch?

The catch is that this inferior process forces your liver to do an incredible amount of stressful work, leading to possible permanent liver damage in extended trials. This inferior energy source also causes mental fog, significantly slower reaction times, dramatic fatigue, and a host of other problems as your body is basically being stressed out. Worst of all is once you return to normal eating from a prolonged period of this dieting method, your body will hyper load and retain fat in self-preservation, just in case you attempt this again. You rarely permanently win by manipulating or tricking the human body for extended periods of time. It’s a bit smarter than you might think. Remember that these are all merely tricks, gimmicks, and techniques to manipulate your body. No extended trick will ever give you the life and body you dream of. Always ask yourself if you can make whatever you are doing a permanent healthy way of life.

Fight your body and it will fight back and win. The human body has evolved over thousands of years as a sophisticated survival tool, so your best bet is to work with its original settings and instructions. Higher protein methods are O. K. for small durations as a technique to give fat loss a quick kick, but by no means is it a way of life. Protein is a powerful necessary building and structural tool in your journey towards reaching your health and fitness goals, but for best results I suggest it be used in balance as evolution intended.

So How Much Protein Do I Need?

A good nutrient balance for the average body by today’s standards is 20-30% protein, 15-25% fat (the good kind) and 55-65% carbohydrates. Individual needs of each category will always vary according to your current health, fitness regimen/goals, and daily activity; so consult your local health/nutrition professional for some precision, or grab a good nutrition book to take control yourself.

Written by Anthony Heredia

A Letter from the Editor – What Happens When the Cancer Comes Back?

2009 has been a bittersweet year for a lot of people. Not only did our economy take a dive, but also some very famous people left this world. As life goes on, we continue to fight and win and lose our battles. It’s pretty well known that October has been deemed Breast Cancer Awareness Month. And I am happy to celebrate those women who have fought the battle and won. Statistically, if detected early, breast cancer has a very high cure rate. And those women who’ve fought the fight and won are told if they are cancer-free for five years, their chances of recurrence are slim. So, as if on borrowed time, they wait. They get their mammograms, check for lumps frequently. They worry when they feel tired or listless. The threat of breast cancer returning is always looming over their heads. But what about those women who’ve successfully passed the 5-year mark? They should feel safe, right? Not always.

In October 2006, Agenda Magazine did a special on breast cancer awareness. We profiled survivors, interviewed local do-gooders who helped women with their illness, and interviewed two charities: Divas with a Cure and Bowling for Boobies. I am sad to announce that Edith Speed, the founder of Bowling for Boobies passed away last summer. She had exceeded her 5-year mark, but the cancer came back, and this time it won. It was a shock. It was sudden, and it left me with all sorts of questions.

Edith was my neighbor, our kids played together, and we frequently socialized, either with our spouses or just us girls. I had just chatted with her on facebook, and a few days later I received an email announcing her memorial. How could she have gotten cancer again? She fought so hard to save her life. Edith had a double mastectomy, making sure the disease was wiped clean out of her body with no chance of returning. Yet it did return.

I quickly learned that breast cancer survivors are faced with the possibility of the cancer coming back, as well as an increased risk of developing a new breast cancer. So what happens when the cancer comes back, and how can you prevent it? The following tips may help you keep breast cancer from returning.

1. In clinical studies, tamoxifen and aromatase inhibitors have been shown to lower the risk of breast cancer recurrence and lower the risk of new breast cancers for certain women.

2. A diet low in fat not only decreases the risk of obesity, it can reduce your risk of breast cancer. We know that estrogen plays a major role in the development of breast cancer. Fat tissue contains small amounts of estrogen and may increase your risk. There have been conflicting studies about fat intake and breast cancer risk; however, all studies have concluded that obesity plays a big part in breast cancer development.

3. Checking your breasts every month may not reduce your risk of developing breast cancer, but it may help detect breast cancer early. The earlier breast cancer is found, the less aggressive the treatment.

4. Studies suggest that smoking at an early age can increase a woman’s risk. Not only can it be a risk for breast cancer, smoking is a definite risk factor for lung cancer.

5. Limit your alcohol intake—each drink you have on a daily basis increases your risk by 7%.

6. Exercise 3-4 times a week.

7. Include different colored fruit and vegetables to ensure you take in a full range of anti-cancer nutrients. Aim for at least 5 portions per day.

8. Include low fat dairy products such as yoghurt, low fat milk, and cottage cheese, which are rich in calcium and often vitamin D, which helps protect us from cancer.

9. Go easy on well-done, barbecued meats. These can contain some cancer-causing substances.

10. Make sure your diet contains fruits and vegetables and high fiber.

Doing these things listed above, will not guarantee a non-recurrence of breast cancer, but you will reduce the risk. For women who have survived breast cancer and have reached their 5-year anniversary, continue to have regular mammograms and do self-breast exams frequently.

In honor of Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I’d like dedicate this October 2009 Issue of Agenda Magazine to Edith Speed, a fighter and philanthropist who helped women with breast cancer through her Bowling for Boobies charity. May the survival rate increase and the risk of recurrence decrease.

To learn more about Bowling for Boobies, visit the website atwww.bowlingforboobies.com.

Read Anthony Heredia’s article “Breast Cancer Risk Factors.”

Kaylene Peoples, Editor in Chief

Work-at-Home Scams – The 3 Best Scams

More than a million people are victims of work-at-home scams each year. Some, I’m sorry to say, had it coming. They went in with their hearts instead of their heads. Others, however, couldn’t have dodged the bullet even if they tried. The work-at-home scam was just too sophisticated for the average searcher.

These days con artists don’t just create work-at-home scams, they create systems that will damage the lives of their victims long after they have pulled out of the scam. Below are some ways con artists take advantage of you.

1. The “send in your resume” scam. This is a difficult scam to detect because it appears to be legitimate. After all, the company is asking for prospects to email them a resume and cover letter. This is something all legit companies do. However, it’s your email address they want.

Once you email them with your resume or to ask for more information, they will attach a malware to their email. This allows the con artist to gain free access to the job seeker’s computer, including passwords and personal email.

Because many people who work online have PayPal accounts, hackers can gain access into these accounts and drain them. They also gain access to the victim’s address book, thus sending the scam to their friends and family or in severe cases, death threats.

Another clever tactic used in this “send in your resume” scam is to ask for a lot of personal information, such as full name, address, sex, telephone-cell-fax, bank account number, copy of Driver’s License or Passport, and occasionally, a Social Security Number.

Once the con artist has obtained this information, it is sold to an identity theft ring.

2. The “I love you scam.” This scam doesn’t start out as a work-at-home scam but is designed as such. It starts with someone, usually in a singles chat room, approaching you to chat. These con artists form bonds with their victims and deceive them into thinking that they love them.

They then pitch a home business idea, or those that are already in business tell them they need their help. Because the victim feels as though they are in love, they can’t or don’t say no.

The con artist then requests money for the business, or the victim is made into third party receiver of funds or packages. The packages are always stolen or were bought with fake credit cards. Because the victim “loves” the con artist, they continue to send money or packages without questioning why they’re not seeing a dime.

In the case of receiving funds, their bank accounts are drained. Victims are always left heavily in debt, and because you are handling stolen goods, this scam can get you prosecuted.

New age work-at-home scams are far more sophisticated than purchasing a box of junk. They leave the victim heavily in debt; destroy their credit rating, as well as your reputation. Fortunately, there are more resources today for victims of work-at-home scams. For example, http://www.fraud.org is an excellent resource for someone dealing with a work-at-home scam.

Written by Jeff Casmer

How Love Happens: The Biology of Bonding

Love, or the lack of it, changes the young brain forever.” Thomas Lewis, M.D.

“There is more hunger for love than for bread.” Mother Theresa

BIOLOGY: The scientific study of living organisms in all its forms and developmental processes

BONDING: A relationship of ongoing mutual attachment between parent and child that begins at birth and establishes the basis for all other relationships

You may question how the way your parents loved you as a child could dictate your love life today. After all, most of us have a hard time remembering what we did last month, including the name of that guy we found on http://Match.com, then met for coffee . . . once. But, your first step in making sense of the nonsense of 21st Century dating is to understand that your earliest family relationships programmed your brain for grown-up intimacy.

Admittedly, Mother Nature did begin with rather primitive requirements for family bonding. To be blunt, before dinosaurs came along, there was precious little of it going on. Take for example, reptiles, whose offspring arrive by egg, and pre- or post-hatching, Mommy Dearest either eats them or leaves them to their fate by simply slithering into the sunset. Not much bonding there. Not much of a brain, either. The reptilian brain neither thinks nor feels. (I know what you’re thinking . . . some men could qualify in this category. But, on with our story.)

Over the next few hundred million years, as brains expanded, so did the quality of bonding between mates and offspring. The earliest mammals evolved with a limbic brain, (our “flight or fight” center), which gave them the ability to feel emotion. Granted, this early brain had a rather short emotional list, namely FEAR for its survival. But, delving more deeply into the limbic brain’s significance, today’s medical students classify its functions as the Famous Four Fs: Feeding, Fighting, Fleeing, and sexually reproducing!

Ah, but leave it to clever Mother Nature to know there had to be something even more wonderful than the FOUR Fs. With another few hundred million years, the amazing limbic brain was overlaid with the even more amazing neocortex (the thinking brain), and nature was on its way to L*O*V*E*. From that point on, mating and maternal instincts began a quantum leap, developing ever more elaborate courting rituals, longer pregnancies, and laser-focused protection of offspring. Eventually, the human brain would be gifted with our unique abilities to shower our beloved mate and children with the language of love, such as music, poetry, love letters, lullabies, and whispered sweet nothings in the night. But, again, back to our story.

Mammals, especially the higher-evolved primates, bond in mutually nurturing social groups, with plenty of touching, rubbing, nibbling, prancing, preening, and shameless cavorting. These behaviors naturally lead to bonding, which often results in babies, who attach like glue to their mothers to be nursed, protected, and nurtured until capable of fending for themselves.

So, the critical key to survival of higher-ordered species is to meet the infant’s biological desperation for parental protection. In humans, such consistent early bonding fulfills our life’s first and most crucial task . . . to learn it is safe to TRUST. How our infant brain learns this lesson builds the platform for all intimate relationships to follow.

Mother Nature planned long ago that little ones are to be protected by the big ones, so she did not equip our baby brain with the ability to cope with stress. Rather, as an infant, your sense of safety and survival depended on feeling peaceful, aka: knowing your protectors were close enough to protect you. In your first thousand days, you were more vulnerable, physically and emotionally, than at any other time of life.

You had no way to express yourself, other than with emotions. Without language, your neocortex (the thinking brain) could not rationalize why Mommy didn’t come when you cried. You could not predict that in five minutes she’d be picking you up and wiping your tears away. You felt life in the moment, without any means to understand what was happening to you, or why. And, with every experience, your feelings programmed your limbic brain with your first impressions of life on this planet.

It all came down to chemistry, that word we toss around as we decide if love is really love. Ironically, once upon our baby days, chemistry was literally all that mattered. Chemistry set the course in our brains that set the course of our lives. Here’s why:

When a mother holds her infant, both brains synchronize in a shared overdose of oxytocin and serotonin, the hormones of love and peace. This brain state of “baby bliss” is nature’s brilliant idea for bonding their relationship for life. In this brief window of time, these bonding hormones cause the mother to fall so deeply in love with her child that her brain becomes hard-wired to protect him for the rest of her life, just like the lioness with her cub. For the infant, mother love is his first love. Her consistent nurturing imprints his brain with his first impression of this strange new world. Feeling safe in her arms sews the seeds for trust, the foundation of adult intimacy, as she bathes his brain in bliss.

As a woman, you experience these very same hormones. When you believe you’ve found your prince, it is oxytocin that takes your emotions to euphoria with just the thought of him. When he loves you in return, serotonin joins the mix, and your shared sense that it’s safe to trust the other cradles your emotional intimacy. Needless to say, blending serotonin and oxytocin makes quite a love cocktail! Maybe even better than a Cosmo!

But, if this love fest is interrupted, nature’s perfect plan takes a detour. When the mother is physically and/or emotionally inconsistent, the baby’s limbic brain too soon senses a disabling threat to its own survival, replacing the bonding hormones with cortisol, the stress hormone. Perhaps you can relate such panic to the times you feared the man you deeply love is slipping away from your life. Your limbic brain pounds you with cortisol-inducing survival questions, like “How can I live without him?” Somehow, you muddle through the grief process and find a way to start over. But, for a baby, when bonding collapses, the limbic brain answers this most legitimate question with deathly terror.

An early life of connect/disconnect, attach/detach, bond/separate care giving interrupts normal emotional development. As the child grows, the unpredictability of his earliest, most vulnerable relationship now creates his unconscious war of psychic survival between fear of abandonment versus fear of not belonging, fear of love versus fear of losing love. In this double-bind dilemma, fear of intimacy overrides the natural longing to bond. As an adult, this wounded soul has no significant experience, or limbic programming, as to what love even looks or feels like. Any attempt at intimacy is doomed, creating suffering in both lover and beloved.

When one’s childhood was fear-based, it’s not hard to imagine feeling terror at the mere thought of intimacy’s demand of vulnerability. Imagine this monologue deep in the recesses of the brain: “I’m so lonely, but if I decide to love someone, they will abandon me. But, I’m deathly afraid of being alone. Without someone, I won’t survive. But if I decide to care for someone, they will abandon me. So, I will sabotage them before they sabotage me. But, I’m afraid, deathly afraid, of being alone.”

Such push-pull craziness often creates dynamics of rigid “black and white” thinking, addictions, controlling power struggles, rage, introversion, pessimism, narcissism, suspiciousness, lying, and impulsivity—every bit of it dictated by fear.

How tragic that the most intricate, complex, miraculous, transcendent creation, the human brain, has evolved over millions, perhaps billions, of years, yet can be so easily tripped up by emotional neglect suffered, primarily, in the first thousand days of its life. Tripped up, but not destroyed.

A wise man once noted, “Knowledge is power.” Perhaps, as you read this article, the suffering of friends, family, lovers, maybe even your own suffering, finds the answer as to why such a life has struggled so much. But, is that life’s longing for love doomed to fail forever because of the failure of others?

Amazingly, the answer is “no.” Modern brain research has proven that positive, self-nurturing choices change our brain, rewiring neural pathways, and transforming limbic patterns of cortisol panic to peace. When one courageously chooses such deep reprogramming, the childhood wounds that have sabotaged any hope of trusting another human being, the core of intimate relationships, can begin to heal.

The power to confront our most wrenching pain, to trust ourselves first, to know who we truly are and what we truly deserve, to choose to nurture our health, our hearts, our thoughts, and our dreams releases within the human brain a flood of hormonal bliss to one hundred billion thirsty brain cells, generating the life force that is greater than nature’s potency to push a fragile flower through asphalt! It’s called love and this is how it happens.

The following resources have profoundly supported millions of men and women in healing the emotional wounds of childhood. I highly recommend them.

RECOMMENDED READS:

* HOMECOMING: Reclaiming and Healing Your Inner Child , by John Bradshaw
* FAMILY SECRETS: The Path from Shame to Healing , by John Bradshaw
* A GENERAL THEORY OF LOVE , by Drs. Lewis, Amini, and Lannon
* TOXIC PARENTS: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life , by Susan Forward
* BECOMING ATTACHED: First Relationships and How They Shape Our Capacity to Love , by Robert Karen, Ph.D
* TOUCHING: The Human Significance of Skin , by Ashley Montague
* MAGICAL PARENT, MAGICAL CHILD, The Optimum Learning Relationship , by Michael Mendizza

RECOMMENDED DVD’S:

* March of the Penguins
* The Weeping Camel

Written by Morgan Delaney

GiveCard – The Gift That Gives Back

Gift cards will be the most requested gift this year, with nearly 55 percent of consumers reporting they would like to receive a gift card this holiday season, according to the National Retail Federation. Each year, 70 percent of consumers purchase a gift card as a holiday gift and for the fifth year in a row, gift cards are expected to lead holiday purchases.

The main reasons shoppers purchase gift cards, according to a study by Deloitte, are

1. They allow recipients to select their own gift.

2. Gift cards are easier and faster to buy than traditional gifts.

However, nearly one quarter of respondents stated they would be less likely to buy gift cards because they feel gift cards are impersonal.

Offering the convenience of a gift card, but a more personal gift, the GiveCard is the first and only gift card that allocates $5 from every card for a donation to a charity of the recipient’s choice. Recipients have the choice of thousands of organizations that they can donate to. The sender has the option to personalize the delivery of the card through online capabilities on GiveCard.com. The rest of the money left on the card is for spending like cash, everywhere Visa debit cards are accepted. It’s like two personal gifts in one.

The idea for including a donation within a gift card came while founder Clayton “Nick” Nicholas was stationed overseas in the military. His mom liked to receive gift cards, but he always wanted to send her something more personal, which was often difficult with limited options and the distance separating them. A more meaningful, personal gift card that benefited a cause she believed in solved the problem–and an idea was born.

On average, if just one percent of gift cards given were GiveCards, an additional $50 million would be donated to charity. That’s the power of microgiving: small contributions adding up to a big impact. With the struggles charities have seen during this turbulent economy, these donations are providing a vital impact. Recipients can choose from thousands of national and local 501(c) registered charities like the American Red Cross, Susan G. Komen for the Cure, and the Humane Society.

By giving a GiveCard, one generates a small donation and joins the growing community of microgivers who realize that when a large number of people make small individual contributions, they can make a big difference. But microgiving is not just monetary; it’s the small acts of kindness and charity made by people around the world every day. Join the microgiving movement on Facebook at www.facebook.com/GiveDay. To learn more about microgiving and GiveCard, visit www.GiveCard.com.